Esmé's Story at Roca Hartford
Roca’s mission is to be a relentless force in disrupting incarceration, poverty, and racism by engaging the young adults, police, and systems at the center of urban violence in relationships to address trauma, find hope, and drive change.
Esmé found herself in a Hartford juvenile detention center at fourteen, eight months pregnant. She remembers when her probation officer gave her a call to tell her about Roca Hartford Young Mothers Program, which had just recently opened.
That’s how Esmé was introduced to Jennie, a youth worker at Roca Hartford. “The first time I saw Jennie, she came to my house. We talked at the table. She was telling me about the program, what they offer, how they help. Then after I gave birth to my daughter, and they took my daughter from me, that’s when I started coming into Roca, like every single day, doing classes, talking to people and Jenny, doing programming and restorative circles.”
Esmé reflects on her early days in the program and her relationship with Jennie that kept her coming back. “She’s the one person that I can really say knows me. Jennie knows how I handle situations, my emotions, how to calm me down, Jennie just knows me. I don’t know how else to explain it. She’s always there for me, she always understood, she always heard me out and never judged. But she always told me when I was wrong, too, and asked me how can we fix it for the next time.” After a difficult conversation that turned into an argument, Esmé stopped talking to Jenny and the Roca staff. But Jennie didn’t give up on her, Esmé remembers: “They came to my house, and they still reached out.” Through Jennie's commitment to Esmé and Roca’s continued relentless outreach, Esmé re-engaged.
Jennie worked with Esmé on developing skills to identify her feelings and change how she reacted to them, using cognitive behavioral skills that Roca teaches to help their young women regulate their emotions and make better decisions. “Now, when I get upset at things, I don’t lash out. I don’t do nothing. I remain calm, I take a deep breath… I’ve come a long way,” she says.
Three years later, Esmé is more motivated than ever. “I’m working on graduating from high school and when I’m older, I want to be a paramedic and a crime scene investigator. There’s no such thing as giving up in my mind, like giving up is not a word and is not an option.”
*This story uses a pseudonym.